


i don’t smoke (except for when i’m missing you)

by severalgeckos



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Pining, Smoking, idk. feelings and shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-08
Updated: 2018-09-08
Packaged: 2019-07-08 09:02:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15927179
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/severalgeckos/pseuds/severalgeckos
Summary: Gavin chainsmokes whenever his repressed feelings come to a boiling point. Nines doesn’t approve.





	i don’t smoke (except for when i’m missing you)

Smoke filled Gavin’s lungs with one deep, burning breath. Inhale, exhale, inhale again, resisting the urge to cough as the nicotine (and tar, formaldehyde, arsenic, and benzene— Nines liked to list them off whenever he saw Gavin smoking) burned his lungs.

He sat on the curb outside of the precinct, watching the cigarette smoke mix with the cold November air. An empty cigarette carton sat discarded next to him, the second one already clutched in his free hand. Gavin ignored the bitter cold, and his sore lungs, and the late hour displayed on his watch, opting instead to snuff out the cherry on his current cigarette before immediately lighting another one. Inhale, exhale, inhale—

“You haven’t left yet, Detective.”

Fuck. He probably deserved this, honestly.

Gavin didn’t need to turn around to know the expression Nines had on his face. His eyebrows would be pinched together in the way they do when he’s trying to figure out a difficult case (or Gavin, his apparent favorite case to investigate), with his lips pressed into a firm line and his eyes examining him for answers. Gavin glanced over his shoulder anyways, because he’s a hopeless mess and he can’t resist it.

The concern on his face was unexpected, though.

Gavin turned back to face the street, before taking a too-fast drag and breaking into a cough. Hopeless, hopeless mess.

“You—  _ fuck,  _ god— you’re a fuckin’.... A-plus investigator, great observation Robocop,” he muttered between wheezing coughs.

It was quiet for a moment, and Gavin almost thought he had finally given up, when he saw Nines gingerly seat himself next to him on the curb. If this had happened a couple months ago, he might have been frustrated that the android’s LED was conspicuously out of sight, but he didn’t need it anymore. Nines’ stone-cold expression didn’t give much up, but he had other tells. The way his eyes crinkled ever-so-slightly at the corners when he was amused, how his face softened when he was happy, or the way he fidgeted when he felt overwhelmed. Right now, it was clenched fists, rigid posture, and furrowed brows.

He really fucked up this time, huh.

“Detective Reed,” he finally said, enunciating each word with forceful clarity. “Your shift ended an hour ago.”

“Yeah, well, I got busy,” Gavin muttered. He snuffed out the cigarette in his hand before realizing that the package in his hand was now empty. Fuck _. _

“I can tell,” Nines replied with a subtle edge creeping into his voice.

His fucking  _ eyes _ . They wouldn’t stop staring at him, analyzing him and probably dissecting every tiny microexpression he made. It made him feel vulnerable, like a patient in a therapist’s office, and the worst part was that he  _ wanted _ to enjoy it. God, he wanted to enjoy it— he wanted to let someone care for him, help him for once in his life, let them in and pull down his walls. He wanted to let Nines be that person for him.

Instead, Gavin hunched further into himself, avoiding the other’s gaze and opting to stare at the small cracks in the pavement. “Shouldn’t you be heading home?” A deflection. They both noticed it.

“I could say the same for you.” What a fucking smartass. A beautiful, heartbreaking smartass.

Nines paused for a moment, and he saw him shift uncomfortably out of the corner of his eye. Fidgeting. He’s nervous.

“What’s… wrong, Detective Reed? I’m not sure what it is that’s been bothering you recently, but I…” Gavin’s resistance broke and he glanced to the side at the android, only to find him worrying his bottom lip between his teeth.  _ Fuck _ . “You are… We…  we’re partners, and I feel like it is my responsibility to help with whatever issue it is that you’re facing.”

Gavin sighed, burying his face in his hands. “Call me Gavin,” he muttered tiredly. “We aren’t… fuck, we aren’t on the clock, and I’m not going to talk about my shitty problems if you’re acting like we’re at a crime scene.”

“Oh.” Nines was quiet for a moment, and Gavin was almost worried he had pissed him off. Or broken some kind of… fuck, android coworker etiquette?

“Alright, Gavin,” he finally replied. Gavin’s name sounded way too damn good when it was spoken by him. “Could you please tell me why you haven’t gone home yet?”

God, this was torture.

“I…” How the fuck was he supposed to say this?  _ Yeah, Nines, I’ve been pining over you like a highschooler with a crush even though there’s no reason for you to be remotely interested in me. _ “I was supposed to head over to this guy’s place tonight, but I ditched him.” And Gavin knew that if he went home he would more than likely end up drinking until he got sad enough to call him over for a sloppy hookup, like he did every time he got like this.

Nines did that unfairly cute head tilt after he was done, and Gavin caught a glimpse of yellow light at his temple. “That’s it?”

Gavin let out a tired laugh, shaking his head. “Nah, I mean…” How was he supposed to explain this to the main cause of his problems? “I… I’m in a, a ‘relationship,’ I guess, with this guy, and he’s having the time of his fuckin’ life, but I… I’ve got feelings for someone else, and whenever I’m with him, all I can think of is what the other person would be doing. Like, I’ll say some stupid shit and he’ll laugh at it, but in my head I’m thinking about how  _ he  _ would have a smartass comment to add to it, or we’ll fuck and the entire time I’m thinking of how different it would be if I was with  _ him,  _ and…” He ran a hand over his face with a sigh. “I can’t keep doing this,” he mumbled quietly.

It was too silent after he finished speaking. Nines was tense beside him, and all he could think about was how he probably just shot himself in the foot by opening up like this.

What he didn’t expect was the steady, surprisingly warm arms that wrapped around his shoulders, holding him in a hug that was firm but light enough to let him pull back if he wanted to.

He didn’t want to.

“You shouldn’t hurt yourself like this,” Nines murmured into the dark brown curls on top of his head. Which was a lie, in Gavin’s humble opinion— he should hurt himself  _ exactly  _ like this, it was what he deserved for falling for someone completely too good for him.

However, when Nines said it like that… It almost made him believe it.

Gavin let himself lean forward into the other’s hold as he let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. “I guess,” he mumbled, face pressed against the smooth fabric of Nines’ sweater. Fuck, he was like a portable heater— it made Gavin realize just how cold he was before.

Tentative hands moved up to gently comb through his hair, moving slowly and soothingly. Nines was so,  _ so  _ good, too good.

He could fall asleep like this. He  _ wanted _ to fall asleep like this.

“Nines?” The man in question hummed, pausing his gentle ministrations. “Can you take me home?” Gavin paused when he realized how that sounded. “I don’t mean— I just meant… it’s late, and I’m a dumbass, and I don’t want to do anything stupid or—“

“I’d love to,” Nines gently interrupted. “...Gavin.”

Oh, this was too much, but it was so good.

“Thanks, Nines.”

**Author's Note:**

> alternate title: “stop naming fics after mitski lyrics you fucking homosexual disaster”
> 
> hmu on tumblr [@rk90o](http://rk90o.tumblr.com). i talk about headcanons and how much i love connor


End file.
